My Story
For so long – really the first 50 years of my life – I hid my true self from the world. I carefully built an image of a competent, confident, contained woman.
In my consulting practice, I led people and organizations from a controlled – but not authentically me – place.
And it was exhausting.
I spent my life scanning, performing, fixing, solving. I believed it wasn’t safe to let my figurative and literal stomach hang out. So I held my whole self in.
Until I simply couldn’t do it anymore.
I was no longer willing to shove myself into a tailored, gray suit and high heels when I’d rather be barefoot, in shorts and a tank top in my backyard.
I quit my business and ended up taking a 3-year break from the world to find out who I truly and deeply was. I spent months largely in my house, venturing out for errands or a daily walk. Friendships based on how I thought I “should” be, fell away.
There were huge stretches of time where my husband and boys were the only people I talked to.
During those fairly lonely years, something began to emerge…tiny flickers of JOY.
By experimenting, I discovered my brand of joy comes from—
wrestling paving stones in our garden,
hiking in the woods,
getting messy with watercolors and cut up LIFE magazines,
biking around the city,
camping near the ocean,
eating chocolate whenever I want,
watching old movies,
enjoying a nightly cocktail,
making jam from foraged berries...
In quitting my business and dropping out of the world, I found something so incredibly sweet.
When I stopped listening to what I “should” do and started following what lights me up, life suddenly became so much easier, and so much more FUN.
I remembered something I have always known – my own inner knowing is the only guidance I ever needed. In fact, the more I listen to it, the more epic my life becomes.
Recently I have also realized that there is something I miss from my old life.
Over the course of my consulting career, there were some beautiful moments that touched my heart. A question I posed, or a pause I offered, caused the room to go quiet.
A stillness descended and a glimmer of light flickered in the woman before me.
I didn’t cause it, I just provided a space where she remembered something about herself – her power, her joy, her own inner knowing. It was pure MAGIC.
I dearly missed those moments.
So I decided – I can have BOTH. I can have a barefoot, joy-filled life — AND create a space where other women remember they can too.
If my story resonates with you, you can read more through my writing. And if you feel inspired, I would love to meet you in a one-on-one session.
If you have questions, or just want to reach out, you can email me at nnedgington@gmail.com.
